RETREAT

TOMORROW'S THE BIG DAY!!!

Our class together with the other section will be having our retreat tomorrow. YEY!

Yeah others might think it sucks. And that its all gonna be those religious shizz. But actually it won't.

Actually, im excited cause theres gonna be lotsa lotsa FOOD! oh yeah! I heard that there would be overflowing foods. And its gonna be FUN!

Another reason for not having class and to bond with my friends! oh yeah!

Giving Up

Right now I'm on the verge of giving up.

I just wanna give up on everything. Especially LIFE.

Technically, life's complicated. LIFE IS UNFAIR. And that's the sad truth. But lately, I feel so lost and useless and other shizz. I just don't know what to do at this moment. I feel like I'm a walking FAILURE. Everything in my life is a big disappointment. A GIGANTIC EPIC FAILURE. It feels like everything I did my whole life is pointless. Even my mom thinks I'm useless. WTH?!

And right now, the only thing that keeps me going is starting to fade away.

I even tried talking to the only person on earth that I think might make me feel less lonely. But it only makes me feel more down.

Right now Im just hoping that I could still hold on.

Hinog sa Pilit

Hinog sa Pilit

Musmos na bata,
Isinilang na walang diwa.

Maagang namulat,
Sa hubad na katotohanan,
Ng ating mundo't,
Matiyagang pakikipag-sapalaran.

Pilit na binuksan and puso't isipan,
Sa hiwaga ng sanlibutan.

Pinalaking matapang at walang kinatatakutan,
Taglay kakaibang paninindigan.
Hinulma upang maging sandata,
Sa laban ng mga matatalinhaga.

Minsa'y naging tahimik na sanggol,
Kalayunan naging batanag makulit at humahabol.

Ngunit ngayong mga dalaga't binatilyo na,
Tila pagka menor de edad ay ninakaw pa.

Mga ngiti ay naglaho na parang bula,
Dugo at pawis ang pruweba.

Dating mga maiingay na tawanan,
Unti-unting napukaw.
At ngayo'y mga seryosong usapan,
Ang kanilang isinisigaw.

Bola, manika at laruan,
Mga nagbibigay kagalakan.
Wari mga munting alaala,
Nang minsang musmos na bata.

Noo'y tinuruan upang huwag maapi,
Ngunit ngayon ay alipin ng sarili.

Mga responsibilidad na pilit na ipinapako,
Hangang sa pagtulog ay ipinagtatanto.

Mga batang walang kabiyak,
Animo sandamukal ang anak.

Bigat ng dalahin,
Wala nino man ang aangkin.
Pasaning di maisisi,
Walang magawa kung di panindigan ng sarili.

Dahil ang musmos na bata ay hinnog sa pilit

DEPRESSED

One word to describe how I'm feeling right now.

A lot has happened since the last time I posted an entry here. I even forgot to update this shizz.

(yeah, i might always say that I'll make it a habit to make an entry. But actually it all depends on my mood and there's nothing you can do about it. lol)

Ok a little wrap up of what had happened.

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So technically, I already graduated from being an apprentice on my org so FINALLY I'm already a full pledge TEATRO TOMASINO MEMBER! YEY! lucky me. ^_^ and not only that, humbly speaking I actually got elected last april to be the Business Director of the Executive Board for the A.Y. 2011 - 2012. Isn't that nice?

Actually,it is! But I have mixed feelings with regards to this. hmmmmm...

Anyway..... as i was saying last April I was...



*COMMENCING TIME WARP*



And now, months later.. everything is so heavy. I don't know what to do now.
I feel like im just doing things cause i have to and not because I want to.
AND IT FREAKING SUCKS!!

I can't tell if I'm dealing with my problems well these days or I just don't give a shit anymore.

KILL ME NOW. FUCK LIFE. FUCK THIS.
AND YEAH I STILL DON'T GIVE A DAMN BUT IT STILL GETS INTO ME. AND IT IS SO DAMN IRRITATING!